What does it involve to help another person access resources? At The Gathering Place, Brunswick’s day center for the homeless and others seeking companionship, we do give out a lot: Coffee, companionship, toiletries, outdoor gear, bus tickets and socks. But what about that hand up to get services that are available? How do you get past, “If they need it, it’s there, they can just get it?” How do you help someone put their hand in yours so you can both pull to lift them up?

I don’t know, really. I think maybe the starting place is to understand that something must be getting in the way. Why else would someone not avail themselves of something they need or something that could improve the quality of their life?

For instance, what could get in the way of someone who’s addiction or mental/emotional state is preventing them from getting and staying with counseling or a self-help group? Maybe it’s fear. So much is happening online right now and having access to technology is critical. So you offer to go with them, call with them. Help them navigate the zoom link sent by their provider and maybe sit with them to make sure this new way of communicating is comfortable. Maybe its embarrassment as the stigma of mental health has not faded. You can’t fully know another’s struggle and so you offer to go with them, call with them.

Or perhaps it’s something simpler, an application for housing or a stimulus check not received. Maybe it’s unfamiliarity with computers. You are familiar with computers. You can walk them through it. How did you learn? Didn’t someone walk you through it? A couple of weeks ago while volunteering at The Gathering Place one of our longtime guests came to visit. We started chatting and he shared that he had not received his stimulus check. He met all of the criteria but was not in the “system.” I was not familiar with the IRS website assigned to this program but I am familiar with computers so we jumped in. Success!

I know this may seem like a small victory but for so many of our guests accessing resources are not easy and maybe you don’t know how to help either. You can work the phones, computers and have the necessary conversations together. You’ll both learn. Maybe it’s that too many hands have reached out and the hands are not there later when they need another. Keep being there, every day or every week. A pandemic hits and The Gathering Place closes temporarily, then they find a way to re-open safely. Be there if you can, with constancy, consistency.

But maybe it’s not them, maybe it’s you. Maybe you are afraid. The chasm that opens if we feel what they felt losing their home or job(s), getting hospitalized for mental health reasons, getting jailed, looking into that chasm, that’s fear.

Maybe it’s your judgment that they got themselves there, they need to get themselves out. Well, couldn’t it be you there if you didn’t have all those helping hands? No, you didn’t make your success all by yourself. You saw hands out and took them.

Sometimes it’s just showing your hand is there, keeping your feet on solid ground and your grip strong. That’s all you need to do to help someone up. At The Gathering Place, we have been blessed with so many hands giving and helping and we will continue to work to open our doors for longer as the need will continue to grow and we will be there to lend a hand.

Phil Studwell is a volunteer and member of the board of directors at The Gathering Place. Giving Voice is a weekly collaboration among four local non-profit service agencies to share information and stories about their work in the community.