DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband does not like social media and forbids me to post pictures of him. I made the mistake years ago of posting a shot of him, and he got so mad. I follow his directions now. People have started asking me if we got divorced because I always show pictures of me with other people, but never with him. How should I handle this? – Missing Husband, Seattle

DEAR MISSING HUSBAND: Your husband has the right to want his image to remain private. There are plenty of people who agree with him about staying off social media. As with everything, there is a downside.

I suggest that you tell your husband that people have asked if you are divorced because he is invisible on your social media pages. Ask him if you can sparingly post shots of the two of you together. Since you are an avid social media user, you want him to be a part of that world with you – if only here and there.

If he says no, honor his request. When you get the question about the status of your marriage, proudly respond by saying how long you have been married – and leave it at that!

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DEAR HARRIETTE: I know a lot of people are excited about gay marriage and all, but I have family members who are still homophobic. We have a cousin who’s gay, and he has been talking more openly about it these days. Well, my great aunt heard him and went off, talking about how it’s a sin and he should be ashamed of himself. It got really awkward. How can we get her to stop being judgmental? – Reality Check, Jackson, Mississippi

DEAR REALITY CHECK: Civil rights history has changed thanks to the Supreme Court’s decision to acknowledge marriage equality nationwide. This is a huge triumph, and it should be celebrated. Understand, though, that social mores take a long time to change. Some people never accept the laws that have been created for our country. For others, it can take years to consider a new way of looking at the world, even when it includes their kinfolk.

You may be able to speak to your great aunt about being kinder to your cousin, but chances are strong that she is not going to change her view, her rhetoric or her ways. Your cousin may be better off talking about his life with those family members who are compassionate and supportive. Given the breadth of support nationally, he does not have to feel alone. He may want to pick and choose with whom he wants to discuss his personal life. Being strategic can be life-saving.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.