The following tale is a fictional account of two deer as they wandered one day last week in the woods near Hacker’s Hill in Casco. No deer were harmed in the creation of this column.

Bert: Why, is that you Harold? Well, I’ll be. I haven’t seen you in forever. How’s that doe of yours doing?

Harold: Long time no see, Bert. Everyone’s fine, thanks for asking. She’s around here somewhere.

Bert: So, how’s your job going?

Harold: Foraging for berries is pretty hard work nowadays. Sometimes I have to travel as far afield as Bucksport. The economy is getting me down for sure. I can’t make a decent living anymore selling these berries.

Bert: Yeah, times are tough. Last winter was really hard, and this summer’s red berry blight killed off a ton of bushes. And I’ve read that the market for domestic red berries is drying up. Deerfolk are turning toward foreign-produced berries. I’m sorry to hear you’re having a rough go of it.

Harold: Yeah, to add insult to injury, I’m also getting shot at while I’m at work. It seems last month all heck broke loose. People coming at me with guns and whatnot.

Bert: That’s what Mainers call hunting season, bucko! It’s runs the whole month of November. You know, for a buck, sometimes you don’t have much sense.

Harold: Oh, I forgot. Funny pun, though. I haven’t laughed for a long time. Too bad it was at my expense. Doesn’t it ever get to you, though, these folks coming after us with guns? And it may just be me, but with Cabela’s in Scarborough now, I’m more worried than ever.

Bert: Yeah, I thought those hunters looked better equipped. Maybe Cabela’s is the reason. I hadn’t thought of that. A couple weeks ago, one hunter walked right past me and I got a good glimpse of him. He had a GPS unit, new Mossy Oak camouflage and a scope almost as big as his rifle.

Harold: That’s all the better to see us with, Bert.

Bert: Oh yes. But I’m not afraid. We’ll just have to outfox them even more.

Harold: You’re a positive buck, you know that? I guess I’m just tired of outfoxing them and the world in general. Yes, I’m thankful to make it through another hunting season, but really, this economy has me worried for the future. Last winter was so hard, but then we had a break with summer not being too hot. I got accustomed to the easy life, I guess. But now it’s back to being tough again. Cold. Snowy. Not enough berries. It’s hurting my wallet. I’m considering asking Congress for a berry bailout.

Bert: Buck up, Harold. Yes, we’re in a bad patch, but times will be good again in the future. But if you don’t make it through these tight times, you won’t be around for when it gets good again. We made it through hunting season. We can make it through anything. Right, buckaroo?

Harold: Yeah, I get it. I just get down sometimes. Life in these old woods is tough. You never know if you’ll see tomorrow. And then those hunters come along and, and, oh I don’t know …

Bert: In every deer’s life, as The Great Deer once said, there will come a time when you’ll have to dodge the bullets. Some bullets are more painful than others, like buckshot. But right now, the bullet you’re contending with is financial in nature. Berries are in decline, so you’re having a hard time making ends meet. But you wait and see. The berries will be back and you’ll be back in business.

Harold: Yeah, you’re right, everything will be fine. Hey, it was great seeing you. I’ll remember that just like hunting season, the economy is cyclical. Sure, times are tough now, but if I stay patient and keep foraging, things will turn around.

Bert: Now you’ve got it. Hey, look over there. I may be colorblind, but isn’t that a red berry bush about 100 yards out?

Harold: Yeah, you’re right Bert. Good eyes! Hey, Bert, I may be colorblind too, but isn’t that an illegal hunter in an orange Mossy Oak camo poncho just beyond that red berry bush?

Harold and Bert: Run through the forest, RUN!

John Balentine, of Windham, is a former editor of the Lakes Region Weekly.