In New England, storms tend to move from south to north. Rain or snow will hit Connecticut first, then spread across Massachusetts and drift northward from there.

What’s true for weather patterns may hold true for school mascot names. There are folks south of the Lakes Region who are hemming and hawing, ripping and roaring over the name of Scarborough’s mascot. If the wind is right, that storm may find its way up here.

Earlier this decade, Scarborough’s mascot was changed from Redskins to Red Storm. Ironically, people now miss the old nickname. “Red Storm,” they say, never made any sense, and so they want to revive the American Indian link. There are many others who disagree and prefer the new name. Ultimately, the Scarborough School Board will decide, but not before the Political Correctness gang adds their two cents.

In Windham, we have the Eagles. Yes, eagles are the national bird, but they are a tremendously hostile bird if you happen to be a small critter or another bird that happens into their territory.

So, when the PC police come, do you think the eagle will survive? No way. The eagle hunts in secret (without a license!), kills almost at will, and tends to be a loner. Is that a good example for our kids?

How about the Bonny Eagle Scots? Yes, there’s “my bonny lies over the ocean,” but have you seen the movie “Braveheart?” Did you see what the early Scottish clansmen did to each other and their enemies? Remember the scene where young William Wallace happens upon a house full of corpses swinging from the rafters, his father’s body among them?

What about the scene where Wallace is leading the Scots against the attacking English army? Remember the animal cruelty inflicted on the English horses as Wallace gave the last-second command for his army to raise their sharpened spears into the chests of the charging equine? Seriously, do you think the PC police would allow this kind of imagery associated with a public school mascot?

The Gray-New Gloucester Patriots will probably have an equally hard time surviving the PC school mascot storm. Yes, we owe our freedom to the original Patriots, but they were anti-government types who didn’t want to pay taxes. Today, we advanced thinkers believe government is the answer to such things as poverty, health insurance, and bank failures. Sure, the Patriots are a fond memory, but they’re antiquated and better left to the history books. Plus, they drank a lot of beer (Sam Adams, anyone?) and minors already have enough problems with drinking.

Fortunately, the eye of this approaching PC storm will probably pass over Bridgton. The Lake Region Lakers will probably survive just because it’s such an innocuous nickname. It doesn’t evoke any images associated with death or brutality, except, that is, if you’re a Celtics fan and hate the Los Angeles Lakers.

So, in preparation for this PC storm, here are a few potential mascot names: The Windham Willows, the Bonny Eagle Bonnets, and the Gray-New Gloucester Shakers.

You should probably come up with your own list, too. Then, when you’re done, we can all get together with the school board and town council and waste lots of time and taxpayers’ dollars, like Scarborough has, debating the merits of each. Sounds fun, doesn’t it?

John Balentine, of Windham, is the former editor of the Lakes Region Weekly.