DEAR HARRIETTE: I met a great woman. We started dating, and we recently decided to attempt a relationship.

The other night, she sat me down and told me she was HIV positive. Although I appreciated her honesty, I am admittedly uncomfortable. I am not one of these ignorant dudes who think that you can get HIV from kissing, and I know that being undetectable (which she is) means there is a much lower risk of transmitting the virus. Also, I know there are methods to help with HIV prevention.

However, I still have my reservations. I would not be comfortable living the rest of my life with HIV if I contracted it, and I don’t think it would be fair to stay with her if I am not comfortable with our current situation.

Should I stay with her, or should I leave? If you think I should leave, how can I go about this in a respectful manner? I don’t want to make her feel stigmatized or judged. – Medical Matters, New Orleans

DEAR MEDICAL MATTERS: What’s great is that this woman was honest with you before you became intimate. This has got to be one of the hardest realities that a couple can face as you are considering how or whether to move forward in your relationship. While it is a fact that you will be at risk for contracting HIV, you are right that there are many ways to reduce that risk.

The big question is whether you can become comfortable in that space. I suggest that the two of you talk about it openly. Tell her that this is difficult for you, but you feel she is worth it. Before you give up, go to the doctor with her. Learn what you can about how to be with her safely. Here is some helpful information: aids.gov/hiv-aids-basics/prevention/ reduce-your-risk/ mixed-status-couples.

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DEAR HARRIETTE: I am working for a large company’s corporate office as an administrative assistant. I have been trying to change my habits and eat healthy by bringing my own lunch, but someone keeps stealing it. I’ve left notes on the refrigerator, but it continues to happen.

A colleague of mine recently told me the person stealing my lunch is another assistant who works in the office down the hall from our department. I was confused, because I was trying to figure out why she would steal my lunch when I’m sure there are other people in her own department. Regardless, I need her to stop stealing my lunch. How can I confront this person and make sure this stops? Groceries are not cheap, and I don’t spend time putting my lunch together to not be able to eat it. – On Watch Duty, Racine, Wisconsin

DEAR ON WATCH DUTY: Stop putting your lunch in the shared refrigerator. Get yourself an insulated freezer bag. Put ice packs in it so that your food will stay chilled. Put that chill pack in a locked drawer.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.