DEAR HARRIETTE: My cousin just got out of Chapter 11 bankruptcy. The legal process and his financial situation spun out of control, so he just got back on his feet. Everyone thought this crisis would cause him to pull it together and mature quickly. Much to everyone’s surprise, he’s acting like a teenager, and the entire family doesn’t know what to do. He is going out to nightclubs, buying bottles and getting so buzzed he can barely stand. Nobody expected this behavior from him. I want to step in and help, but I don’t even know what my first step could be. I refuse to condone his partying ways, but he seems to be in contact with party people only. How can I help my cousin? No one in my family has gone through bankruptcy except for him. He is in his 30s. – Save That Money, Atlanta
DEAR SAVE THAT MONEY: You can ask your cousin to get together and then tell him face-to-face
that you are worried about him and his seemingly reckless behavior. Tell him the whole family is concerned about his well-being. Given that he just turned a new leaf by getting out of Chapter 11, you hope that he will be able to make strategic choices that will help him to get back on his feet. While you know that it is none of your business, tell him that you worry that his partying may get in the way of his potential success.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a friend pick up a prescription for me, and I suspect she peeked into the bag the medicine came in. I assumed it was basic etiquette to not open something so private. I have some heart issues that I don’t share with others, but I feel like she has to know because she always asks if I’m all right, especially when I’m out of breath. I don’t need her help, and I thought this medicine would never be spoken about again after I thanked her. It was one day
that I was in a bind, and she offered to help me out. Could she have offered to pick up my prescription just to snoop and find out what medications I’m taking? I’d like to educate her on how to properly handle situations like this because I completely regret trusting her to not look at what medicine I take. – Private Pills, Annapolis, Maryland
DEAR PRIVATE PILLS: You can’t go backward in time. The next time she pries about your health, tell your friend that you regret having asked her to pick up your medicine because you believe she violated confidentiality by looking at your medicine. Tell her that you are not interested in discussing your health with her. Leave it at that.
— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
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