The Democratic Party got its hat handed to them last week. Good. It deserved it. I know. I am one of them.

Like a third-grader who doesn’t receive all A’s and then blames everyone and everything but himself, the party doesn’t “get it” yet concerning the Nov. 4 beat-down.

As a public service, here are the five points that Democrats should keep in mind for the foreseeable future in campaigns.

Start to like people. I know that may sound stupid, but people don’t feel Democrats LIKE them. Care about issues that affect them? Sure. But want to hang out with them?? Nope. Democrats don’t want to come to your backyard BBQ (although they DO care that there is an FDA that has inspected your beef, etc). Gov. LePage does.

Be concise. A Hollywood producer once said, “If you can’t write your idea on the back of my business card, you don’t have a clear idea.” Amen. Boil down climate change, immigration policy and Ebola into 10 words or go away.

If your ideas are “new,” and perhaps strange, say so. One of the most brilliant (and successful!) politicians in Maine history was the late Rodney Quinn of Gorham. An Air Force colonel, he was a “tough guy” but also a Shakespearean scholar. He came out early (1980s) for gay rights. Shocking! He told constituents he supported homosexual anti-discrimination legislation. “I voted for the queers!” he wrote. “Sorry!” This was how he broached difficult issues – and got broad support. (Obamacare has merit, but it is not a chapter of the Bible; say that humorously!).

Realize who you are – and aren’t.

Gov. LePage, an affable oaf and occasional social buffoon, said over and over and over in the campaign: “I’m not a slick, smooth-talking politician…” Democrats snickered. Well, guess what, Chauncey – LePage “connected!” Michaud needed to do a 60-second commercial in the final week: “You’re not going to run into me at some Mensa picnic for geniuses, or at a Winston Churchill public speaking contest. But I know how to get good people around me, ask them for help, and come to the right decision.” Then, turning to former Sen. George Mitchell behind him, “And that won’t change when I am Governor.”

Like Clint Eastwood said as Det. Harry Callahan in “Dirty Harry:” “A man’s got to know his limitations.” LePage did. Michaud didn’t.

Be genuine, and “walk the walk.” Democrats always talk about how they are the party with the “big tent.” That is true. But, having been an active Democrat for 30-plus years, I will tell you I don’t think they really LIKE the people inside the tent. In any event, they don’t really talk with them all that much.

There ought to be a new rule in the Democratic Party. Before you can run for major office, you need to have done all of the following:

Go to a NASCAR event;

Go to a bowling alley;

Eat at least one tug of Beef Jerky (the stuff on the cash-register counter of EVERY small store in Maine);

Go to a Saturday night bean supper;

Listen to a country music station for two consecutive days (Note: WPOR is about 10.1 FM numbers to the right of NPR on the dial);

Drive Route 17 from Augusta to Rockland (and count each “Bob’s Small Engine Repair” shops, and “Flo’s Hair Magician” in-home salons. That’s Maine, Bubba. Not the Old Port cobblestones).

Hate to be the bearer of bad news. But the definition of insanity is to do things over and over, but expect different results. Time for a makeover, compadre. Get off your pedestal and get to work.

Dan Warren is a Scarborough lawyer who can be reached thru private Facebook message at the Jones & Warren page, or by email at jonesandwarren@gmail.com.